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Michael
Could counter with a equally silly list of how to spot a conservative, things like, the rapture bumper stickers, their ditto head opinions, ect, but what would be the point aside from insulting people who are really my fellow americans, and although I might think they are missguided, I realize they are doing what they think is right. I believe that our shared country is in trouble, and perhaps this is a time to pull together rather than driving each other furthor apart, but you'll do what you want, good thing we aren't at war or anything.
They're probably Socialists and will tell you they don't mind paying extra taxes to have free health care. Of course, it's likely that they don't pay much in taxes as it is (at least, in my family). And by the way, they want that health care to include unlimited access to their favorite pet “birth control” method, better known as abortion.
They honestly think the debate about global warming is over, that Hillary and / or Obama possess leadership qualities, and that the media is biased ... against liberals (but honestly, I think that's just because Fox News and Rush are "allowed" to be on the air).
They believe the US is the bad guy in everything that is wrong with the world and that if we leave Iraq, peace will abound. So they are not only naive, they are dangerous.
But isn't it odd that yours are stereotypes, while remarks like "poor, uneducated, and easily led" don't generally get that label.
One thing: Spelling and syntax are vital for credibility. As a poor, uneducated, and easily led person, I've learned to be quite careful. One must be careful about one's intellectual reputation, after all. ;)
My responses:
1) **Funny**
2) Worth a Technorati "Favorite"
3) Must have been effective, seeing what fell out of the tree
(Again, all in good fun)
-Driving an SUV or otherwise environmentally ridiculous gas-guzzling monstrosity
-Despite His entire lifestyle and point of his life, they think Jesus is a Republican and they frequently play this card to justify presidential actions ("That's God's man, God's president up there")
-They hold their morals, of course, above all else...except those Swiss bank accounts...oh, and those white-collar crimes...
-When little Johnny sneaks into his grandfather's arsenal and shoots up his elementary school, their mottos are "Give him the death penalty!" and "Guns don't kill people, people do."
-They get incredibly defensive any time George Bush is mentioned.
-Their bumper stickers include "Don't Mess With The U.S.", "Don't Be A Girlie Man, Vote Republican", a pro-Dubya sticker, and the ever-popular "God is a Conservative."
-Wearing a suit, tie, and a fake smile, with a Bible in their briefcase (that they haven't read in much detail lest it disband most of their worldview)
-They pass by the homeless people on the streets and change the channel on the Save The Children commercials, complete with a lecture to any nearby ears about how "those people just need to go get a job...why, I got my first job at age 15, and by the time I was 22 I was C.E.O. of my own company..."
-Characterized by a distinct inability to laugh at themselves. After all, if you mock a Conservative, you're mocking GOD, right?
-It is unlikely that they are able to see things like sunsets and paintings, because their view is constricted to only black and white.
Your list is funny, too. All in good fun. :*)
Have a great day!
c
1. Say "Hi!"
2. Smile, or generally be congenial
3. Do a funny dance
4. Whistle
5. Paw at his/her breasts
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. You fill in these for fun!
"-They pass by the homeless people on the streets and change the channel on the Save The Children commercials"
A conservative is much more likely to give to the needed on the street than a liberal. Not that there aren't exceptions to every rule mind you...
... I did laugh at yours too, btw.
1. Open-minded.
2. Caring.
3. Invested in world issues.
4. Questioning (rightly) of authority.
5. Considerate of diverse peoples and cultures.
6. Idealistically (un)motivated.
7. Creative and/or appreciative of artistic talent.
8. Free-spirited.
9. Accepting.
10. Good natured.
Whereas conservatives can often be described as:
1. Uncompromising.
2. Caring.
3. Grounded in immediacy.
4. Patriotic.
5. Proud of their own culture and background, and wary (rightly) of religions ripe with extremist sects, and cultures contrary to their way of life.
6. Pragmatically motivated.
7. Productive.
8. Morally-strict.
9. Steadfast.
10. Good natured.
There is nothing to say whether the pragmatist or the idealist is more correct in their world view, and it is rare that a government allows both to strive for their place in creating a free and true nation.
Where do I stand?
I'm pro-choice, though I believe that a woman makes her choice long before conception, and that abortion is amoral except in very narrow circumstances, such as rape or the endangerment of the life of the mother.
I believe in the separation of church and state, in that this is a democracy, and not a theocracy, but none the less founded on the ideals of Christian morality, to include the morality of most major world religions.
I accept the theory of evolution and also the hand of God in the creation of our world, and that God has set the parameters, or works within the boundaries, of the laws of nature, but also that modern science does not have a full understanding of the universe, and that science and faith are not mutually exclusive.
I see vast corruption of the intent of the law and our government on the part of both major parties. A major part of this degradation is financially and agenda driven. It is by the hard-working, diligent patriots and idealists, and through the grace of God, that our nation continues to flourish. Like my own religion, the people in government may not be perfect, but the form and ideals of our beloved government are top notch.
"If nothing can be known, then I cannot know that, therefor I prove that I know nothing." -Aristotle
I found this cartoon more accurate and funny, but still relevant.
1. Say "Hi!"
2. Smile, or generally be congenial
3. Do a funny dance
4. Whistle
5. Paw at his/her breasts
My list
6. Hand him/her a tissue since they are always crying about something!
7. Refer him/her to a therapist
8. Call a priest so they can perform an exorcism
9. Give them some prozac
10. Bail them out of jail for protesting at a Cindy Sheehan rally!
I'm really not sure why ideologues feel the need to vilify each other. I'm not particularly fond of conservatives at the moment, but I attribute that largely to the amount of mud-slinging that's become popular in the last few years. Politics has never been a pretty place, but in the last ten years or so it's gotten positively lethal.
I suppose that, given the way liberals dominated the political landscape for so very long, conservatives had to adopt a more extremist attitude in order to get attention. The natural liberal response was, "what? What the hell was that about?" Now we have conservative leaders in office who consider it their Constitutional right to lie to the nation in order to achieve their goals. We have other conservative leaders elected on moral platforms they themselves can't uphold. We have conservative pundits slandering political opponents as "flip-floppers" while they themselves shift stances to justify the means to their ideological ends. The hypocrisy is staggering, and yet the core conservative crowd maintains a cheerful, "everything is going according to plan, but liberals are still to blame" policy while public sentiment shifts away from them like an earthquake.
Seriously, folk. Polemicists like Ann Coulter are not helping to create a civil dialog between ideologies, they're just mocking each other and creating more hostility. The last thing we need is a jihad declared between conservatives and liberals.
Lots of automobiles covered with bumper stickers there.
Really. I never would have guessed that!
Comment by Preston
July 20th, 2007 7:51 pm MyAvatars 0.2
I find many liberals to be:
1. Open-minded.
2. Caring.
3. Invested in world issues.
4. Questioning (rightly) of authority.
5. Considerate of diverse peoples and cultures.
6. Idealistically (un)motivated.
7. Creative and/or appreciative of artistic talent.
8. Free-spirited.
9. Accepting.
10. Good natured.
Whereas conservatives can often be described as:
1. Uncompromising.
2. Caring.
3. Grounded in immediacy.
4. Patriotic.
5. Proud of their own culture and background, and wary (rightly) of religions ripe with extremist sects, and cultures contrary to their way of life.
6. Pragmatically motivated.
7. Productive.
8. Morally-strict.
9. Steadfast.
10. Good natured.
this is sooo funny.
I'm very liberal but these things always make me laugh.
There is definitley a little bit of truth in them though.
I love the Beatles and have tons of BumperStickers.
I also love lattes, The New York Times, Tofu ect.
lmao.
And it's taken less than 100 years for "godless" Communists/Socialists to surpass them in the murder category!
Keep relying on man to have all the answers!
1. the men look like women and the women look like men
2. they think "critical thinking" is a board game
3. they claim that they believe in "sticking up for those who are too helpless to stick up for themselves" while saying it's okay to kill the most helpless in our society (unborn children)
4. they believe the hard-working should be punished with heavier taxes
5. they are the ones who haven't thought of such mundane details as to "who is going to pay for all this" when they come up with harebrained ideas. It just sounds good.
I know how to tell if your neighbor is A liberal. They let there children run around the neighborhood day and night destroying property. Disrespect for adults have no fear of police. We cant spank them you know. If it feels good do it no matter how it my affect the community. They let the grass grow as tall as your head. They don't want to cut it because it might destroy the Eco system.
Here is how to spot a Conservative that hurts Conservatives more than any lefty-lib(one that fills every stereotype in the book).....
It's Dot!
One that calls other parents "irresponsible"/"uncaring" etc... , and to call "any liberal's" children disrespectful...
...Yet was not even responsible enough to learn, as a "respectful Conservative" child, the difference between "there children" and "their children"?
"Them there kids...." -- is that what you meant to say?
They are "vein people"?
I thought we all have veins?????
Are you conservatives perhaps,maybe, aliens from a different planet? You don't require a circulatory system?
People like you disrespect our entire generation of humanity, along with those that came before us.
==================================================================
SHELLY KANE
off road camper trailers
Dear Bud,
Harry Reid and Senate Democrats have proposed slashing Medicare funding by nearly $500 billion to help pay for their government takeover of health care.
Many Senate Democrats will deny the harm done to American seniors by these cuts, but you simply cannot cut $500 billion from Medicare without affecting the quality of care.
These cuts include $120 billion from the Medicare Advantage program; $150 billion for providers including hospitals, nursing homes, and hospices; and $23 billion in unspecified cuts to be overseen by a government advisory board.
American needs health care reform that lowers costs while increasing the quality of care. Please join me and my fellow Republican Senators as we try to stop these irresponsible reductions from American seniors. Sign the petition today and pass it along to five of your friends so that we may stop Harry Reid's bid for a government takeover of health care today. His plan comes with a price tag we cannot afford to pay.
Sincerely,
Dr. Tom Coburn
U.S. Senator (OK)
We've never met a statistic without split-personality disorder. Viewed in one light, for instance, losing 11,000 jobs in a month is relatively dandy for the US economy. It looks, prima facie, as though her job(less) market is bottoming out...that things could soon be on the mend. And lo, her unemployment figure even dipped, down from 10.2% to "just" 10%.
But wait just a minute, we hear those skeptics say. How could this be? How might an economy lose jobs and simultaneously witness a fall in the unemployment rate? Well, those figures don't allow for the people who are simply "defined" out of the workforce. For instance, the number of "discouraged" workers - literally people who have given up looking - increased by 53,000 to 861,000. In other words, more people "left" the official unemployed pool than joined it...even though they didn't actually find a job. Incidentally, that's the most "discouraged" workers since the recession began...which is pretty discouraging.
But why would people stop looking for a job when there's a recovery underway? Don't they watch the news? Good question. Maybe they went home for the holidays to sleep on Ma and Pa's couch...or maybe they're waiting until after Christmas to renew their efforts...maybe they're just fed up with getting knocked back...
Or maybe it's all of the above...
According to the Department of Labor report, the number of long-term unemployed (those jobless for 27 weeks and over) increased by 293,000 over the past month to 5.9 million. Two in five unemployed people now fit into the "long-term" category, up 2.7% from last month.
Statistics, you see, are rarely as straight-faced as they first appear...particularly when they end up on websites ending in "dot.gov."
Right on. For some good info in this regard, check out these links:
http://www.budshotspots.webs.com
http://theconservativevoice.webs.com
You sure said a lot in only 6 words! Hope you keep posting.
Obama is not qualified to run a lawnmower. I would not allow him to mow my lawn. HE HAS NO COMMON SENSE! Like Dora and the rest of his drooling little tag alongs. His followers put me in mind of the RATS that followed the Pide Piper to their death. THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING. They are nasty little rats! Billy and I talked about it a little, you know, the brainwashed segment?
Professors at Harvard are like professors everywhere. They can't "do" so they teach; and the crap they teach is pure fantasy. Harvard profs will be the last to know that the stimulus is a giant failure. And how about "Cash for Obamacare?" The healthcare package he wants will bankrupt America...forever. Of course, liberals don't care that China owns us. Pretty soon we'll all be marching around with those funny green hats; working at factories where we assemble defective products. What is the new liberal motto? "Buy Chinese?" Damn, I wish I could get one of these nurses to bring me some take-out.
Obama fo fama banana! He shouldn't be in office - he should be impeached. The man doesn't even have a valid birth certificate!
Billy
they believe in Saint Palin even though all evidences points to her one target in life: Greed.
Bubble Brain would not dare read this link because it would shatter his little woodie for her:
and I do mean little.
http://mediamatters.org/topic/bookwatch/
I think you may have got that wrong. "Dribbling Blubberal" has a nice ring.
Hey, good to read ya.' Where you been?
I tried...I really tried, but when I saw the name, I couldn't go home. So...how are you doing, Mouth? Still spewing your usual vomit; leaving it for everyone else to clean? Well, I have a pleasant surprise for you. Now that I have my fingers back and a new coat of skin, I'm confident that I can match your vulgar tongue obscenity for obscenity...oh, that's right, you don't use obscene words. Everything you write is obscene.
By the way, did you read that list at the top here? You fit the criteria perfectly, but then I guess you are proud of that. Why, Mouth, you're so full of yourself - it's hard to imagine how much space you take up - what did you weigh in at - 450? I think I'm going to change your name to Blubbermouth. Like it? Boy oh boy, this is going to be fun!
See what I mean? Only UC notifications reach this address. I wonder why that is? UC must have paranormal powers.
Hey, in regard to this thread, check out http://www.theconservativevoice.com Some interesting stuff there.
Oh, I almost forgot. UC...I rarely carry grudges, but I have one question and one statement for you.
1. Why is it that only your mail reaches my site?
2. Fuck You
Regards,
bobcatbilly59
Dora is a schill. She is a paid blogger for UC. This is a fact.
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UC is up their fucked up tactics again. Running me around on sign in and isn't it strange that only UC gets through to my live.com address? Well, since they iniiated the war again, I guess we'll go the same route.
Urbanconservative is a FRAUD. They are a liberal website posing as conservative; collecting comments for future use against us.
==================================
THIS SITE IS POISON
================
> Subject: [conservativeblog] Re: 10 Tips on How to Spot a Liberal
...and JackieM....Dora must be asleep. Sssshhhh. Let's not wake the Sleeping Mouth. Last time that happened we got a projectile vomit that came out of her ear and splattered the whole site. There's something really foul about her liberal puke. We should get her a Puke Bag...you know, like those feedbagas they use for horses. Oh my God! What happens if she takes a crap on us? We'll have to send her to Dr. Libshitz.
You're 100 percent correct. Can you imagine what it must be like for the poor slob that has to empty that bag?
HELP WANTED
Nose amputee wanted for position of Director of Stench. Must be willing to empty my puke bag.
Call Dora at 999-3333-1212
An Equal Stinquituity Employer
I am commenting as a Guest! Stop forcing me to comment as anyone else. I do not consider myself to be a welcome member here. Do you understand? Let me repeat it.
I DO NOT CONSIDER MYSELF A WELCOME MEMBER HERE
===============================================
Why are you forcing me to log in as bobcatbilly?
Your site is as sloppy as Dora's puke! Your ethics are non-existent. YOU ARE FRAUDS. And you are morons - you banned me frm the site last month! You sent me Fatal Error links.
=============================FUCK YOU===============================
Thanks for the compliment. I think my sense of humor came in my genes...uh oh; I don't think I worded that right. Let me try again. I think it's genetic. My father was a circus clown who traveled with a band of Mennonite gypsies. My mother met him at Red Skelton's funeral. She worked as a nurse for a doctor that performed circumcisions for extra-terrestrials from the planet BlorggghhhAaphahataaah - Glipp and occasionally for beings from the fifth moon of the planet Geggleshptu.
It's actually quite a romantic story. My Dad, who is a direct descendant of the Molavitch Bulavitch Makemeahsandwich clan from Eastern Europe, took one look at my Mom, who came from her nostrils, and immediately puked on her new $3.00 dress. I guess you could say that they fell in love at first puke. Anyway, both of them are deaf mutes, so the only way they can communicate is by pukes and farts. If my father pukes three times and then farts twice, that means "What time is dinner?" You can imagine what it must have been like for me growing up in that environment. All I heard and saw was fart, fart, puke, puke, puke, fart, puke...it was kind of like a Gastric Morse Code.
All of this is so ingrained in me that I don't even try to be funny. That can be a real curse. When I got married 300 years ago, I had a slip of tongue and said "Will you be my awful wretched wife?" And she was!
Naturally I became a conservative because I grew up with a sp sp sp speech imp imp impediment and pronounced liberal as "lipproll." I'd tell people "I'm a lipproll" and they'd do that thing with their lips; or they'd take me to a Chinese restaurant. They never had lipprolls so they always gave me shrimp rolls.
So that's the story. Pretty depressing, isn't it?
I can 50% relate to the Clampetts, possum was a great dish but we never ate the innerds... That was the other 50% of the tail. Our small animals had to eat to. So, we killed two possums with one stone and fed the innerds to them...
Grits was never a favorite after my teeth wore out grinding the sand that came off the rocks we used to grind the corn to make the grits. My whole generation is without teeth. We wore them all out eating grits. Should have made it thinner so we could have drank it without chewing... Go figure. Just a bunch of red-necks surviving.
Go easy...I still can't laugh without pain in my ribs. I am really hurting after reading that one about the grits. I did tell you that I ate my Aunt Edna's liver, didn't I? True story.
About my Aunt Edna's liver, you can find a wealth of information on accidental cannibalism at
http://theconservativevoice.webs.com and
http://theunlimitedexpress.webs.com
Some pretty oureageous stuff there.